GUEST BLOG: DARKEST HOUR’S MIKE SCHLEIBAUM

This is yours truly Michael J. Schleibaum (not Fox, unfortunately) reporting from this year's inaugural Thrash and Burn tour. Since Revolver has been scammed into letting me tarnish their reputation with my writing, allow me to introduce myself: In addition to being a Michael J. Fox fan, I also play guitar in the thrash/punk-inspired melodic-death-metal band Darkest Hour. So, it is with the writing skills of a death-metal guitarist that I present to you the weekly Thrash and Burn Blog!

As I write this week's first update, I am sleeping on a foldout couch of a rental RV with eight other dudes sprawled out all over the place. Tour manager and close friend Tito Picon had the sad duty of waking everyone up at 6 A.M. this morning. Turns out the transmission on our tour bus was on fire. One redneck mechanic’s diagnosis later and we learn the bus needs a new transmission and a total overall. (But, she’s a good old bus!)

The aftermath of the bus breakdown, we got a back up on I-76!

Bus swap…well, not really. More like walk of shame.

So, for the next few days we will be rolling deep with nine smelly dudes in an RV sleeping on everything but the walls. As many of you know, disaster is nothing new to Darkest Hour and over our eight years or so of touring we've learned to take most things like this in stride. I think the appropriate phase for the situation right now is, "Fuck it." So with that in mind, here's how it all went down:

Day One
Albuquerque, NM: July 29, 2008. We opened the tour at the Sunshine Theatre in Albuquerque. When you're on a package that has 10 or so bands, plus crew, that could be as many as 70 people to meet on the first day! It wasn't too long before all the bands were introducing themselves and a real good vibe started to form. As soon as our friends in Parkway Drive and Misery Signals showed up, we knew good times were on their way. Unfortunately, not every band made the first show, as Abigail Williams had to cancel. Since it was day one and this line up represents the core of this year's bands, here's a brief description of who played:

Parkway Drive: Australian metal and ready to rock hard as fuck! With their newest hybrid of metal and hardcore, these Aussie's get as crazy as Paul Hogan in Crocodile Dundee 2.

Misery Signals: Take melodic hardcore/punk, mix in some shredding metal, sprinkle on some ambient melodic textures, blend it all up in one big circle pit and you got one sickass band of badass bros!

Stick to your Guns: Abrasive punk/hardcore. Think Converge meets Black Flag meets Hatebreed! Bouncers of the world beware!

Winds of Plague: A Lord of the Rings epic-metal onslaught from southern California. Keyboards, solos, riffage, demons, dragons—it's all there!

Arsis: Real, real, real metal. Think Death but more progressive. Get out your tab books, kids, because these dudes shred!

Arsonists Get All the Girls: A spazzy-jazzy-metal-hardcore-freakout-fest! Just go see them live—you’ll know what I mean.

After the Burial: Meshuggah-worship done with taste and reverence to the metal gods! Crushing shit! These dudes have been through a ton on the tour and they really are fucking heroes for pulling it all off!

Day Two
Oklahoma City, OK: Thrash and Burn's Oklahoma date was hosted at the Diamond (Darrel) Ballroom. Yeah, actually the “Darrel” isn't official, but I mean, it's only a matter of time before Dime gets a Country Western Ballroom in his name. Having had some of the worst days of my life in Oklahoma (just Google Darkest Hour and Oklahoma...it's another story for another time) I was scared to even get out of my bunk and leave the tour bus. Yet with the sick good-time vibes of all the good dudes in all the bands, I am happy to say that Oklahoma brought it in true fashion! I believe that the Darkest Hour curse in Oklahoma may just have been lifted.

Roadside Sunset.

Day Three
Kansas City, KS: Day three marked day one for Abigail Williams from Arizona! Yeah, buddy! Sounds like fast-as-fuck black metal inspired metal/hardcore! Get ready to blast beat some faces off! Day three also marked the first ever Kansas City heavy-metal beach volleyball concert! Well, not really, but in true Spinal Tap fashion we had a metal concert and three beach-volleyball sandpits going at the same time. Don't get me wrong, it set a killer island vibe and inspired us all to drink a few more Coronas!

Day Four
Dayton, OH: Darkest Hour, LLC, has instituted new rules for casual Friday. Hawaiian T-shirts now may be worn (in fact, are encouraged by upper management). Yep, even hardcore tours force their participants to show their flair! Everybody at the club looked at us like we were fucking crazy (that's understandable when 40 or so people show up dressed in the best Hawaiian attire that Dayton-Oh thrift stores have to offer), and there will be at least a few kids that think it’s cool to wear Hawaiians to the next Hatebreed concert they go to.

Paul and Ryan obviously got the memo about Hawaiian shirt day!

Day Five
Detroit, MI: Well, you already know how Day five is shaping up for me. But, regardless of rolling up to the show in a school bus (whose driver just happened to stop on the side of the road when she saw our bus smoking)…

The original walk of shame!

…Detroit and Dirt Fest showed they knew how to get dirty! I think we have broken every piece of gear that worked before the show. But usually great shows call for long sound checks the next day.

Dirt FEST!!!!!

So that's it, week one of the Thrash and Burn US tour. Time to grab some bench seats and hope to get a few hours of sleep before we do it again. See you dudes in the pit.

The party’s here where are you!

Mike