GUEST BLOG: LANDMINE MARATHON’S GRACE PERRY

After weeks and weeks of nothing interesting in my life, Armageddon has finally come and gone. Last Saturday the planets aligned for Landmine's Rusted Eyes Awake CD release party, which got face-fucked.

Grace (left) and friend

After weeks of planning and promoting all that's left is scraps of my sanity and a few serious bruises. Everything started out great; the bands were stellar, shots were only two bucks (and after seven of them I was unable to pronounce "Landmine Marathon" properly. What a tongue twister! Yeah guys, I REALLY shouldn't have driven home that night.) Our friends Job for a Crotchbag even joined the lineup dressed in women's clothes. Which made them look hotter than all the "Hottest Chicks in Metal" combined!

My only real regret is not wearing my sexy dead bear costume, gloves and all. At a quarter ’til midnight Landmine took the stage and proceeded to brutalize things. Shit got crazy but nothing to really shake a stick at. Then out of nowhere the no-nuts ass-face fucks-wads, a.k.a. Big Fish Pub security guards, decided to get all aggro and throw some of our friends out for having a good time.

I’m not sure who stopped playing first, to be honest—at the time I think I was laughing and grunting incoherent things into the mic.

But after 4.5 songs, one big taser push battle erupted. The security guards actually pulled out fucking tasers on people. Everyone in the entire venue got kicked out…yes, that's right, we got kicked out of our OWN CD release show! WHAT THE FUCK? If I were not a skinny white girl that can barely do one push-up, someone would have felt my wrath that night. Days have passed and the dust has settled but I'm still raging, as you can tell. Next week we leave for tour to once again unleash our shit on shit. Hope I make it. Fuck tasers.

XOXO Grace