Maynard James Keenan Tips for Becoming a Wine Aficionado

When not stomping around onstage in Tool, A Perfect Circle, and Puscifer, Maynard James Keenan has been known to stomp a few grapes in his Arizona-based Merkin Vineyards. A good chunk of Puscifer’s upcoming second album, Conditions of My Parole, was even recorded in the viticulturist’s wine cellar. So Revolver asked the singer–who is interviewed in the new issue of magazine, available on newsstands everywhere and online right here–for a few tips on how to best appreciate our sips.

Watch your sugar intake
“One of the first things that’s going to interfere with anyone trying to appreciate wine is sugar. If you’re really serious about learning about wine, the best way to learn about it is get a couple bottles of the same thing. If you’re a person who drinks a lot of Coca-Cola, or eats candy, or eats a lot of ketchup and mustard, go ahead and have your wine with those foods. Then don’t eat or drink any of that stuff for a week. Just stick to stuff that’s not seasoned. No sugar. Don’t eat sweet stuff for a week. Then have your wine and try to recall your experience before when your palate was completely polluted with the sugar.”

Beware of the heat
“Think of wine like you would ice cream. If you’re picking up wine from somewhere and you put it in the trunk of your car and watch a movie and expect the wine to be OK when you get back… it’s just not going to be. It’s a vulnerable product. The heat will ruin it. That’s why we don’t ship during the summer. Once it’s left your hands, there’s no way to control how the postal service is gonna get it to you. They’ll just leave it in a truck in the sun in Phoenix overnight. Your wine’s toast.”

Know your allergies
“If you think you’re allergic to sulfites in wine, but you drink fresh orange juice—then you’re not allergic to sulfites. You’re probably more allergic to histamines or wines that have more wood in them then they should. Really oaky, woody wines. People think they’re reacting to the wine, when they’re really reacting to the wood tannins. Choose a wine that’s not been aged in oak.”

As told to Christopher R. Weingarten

 

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  • Anonymous

    Good to know!

  • http://www.facebook.com/Sylve5ter Sly Cooper

    Definitely going to try the thing with the seasonings/sugar. :D

  • http://www.facebook.com/Sylve5ter Sly Cooper

    Definitely going to try the thing with the seasonings/sugar. :D

  • DeAnna

    Great advice, I totally trying the sugar cleanse next time I plan a tasting trip!

  • mom

    This Guy….drop ur tool album already…when u get that outta the way ill try all the wine shit and take ur advice…which im more then sure is good considering…if im the man then ur the man and he’s the man as well

    • Fluffbomb

      “ur” should be you are
      “u” should be you
      “ill” should be I’ll
      “outta” should be out of
      “im” should be I’m
      “then” should be than

      No one will ever take you seriously with such poor grammar and spelling.

  • Mhorrigan Riarth

    great wine, great advice
    -boston

  • Collective Thoughts on Mom

    Nobody wants your input, nobody wants to hear your inability to think in our own mind, so do us all a favor and fall off the planet.

    • Alexandermace89

      if you really dont give a fuck about this guy. why the hell are you taking the time to talk shit and read his input. 

    • Alexandermace89

      if you really dont give a fuck about this guy. why the hell are you taking the time to talk shit and read his input. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Bonny-Masters/100001687872124 Bonny Masters

      Actually, nobody wants YOUR imput. If you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say it. Mind your manners and don’t ruin it for everybody else, grow up.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Bonny-Masters/100001687872124 Bonny Masters

      Actually, nobody wants YOUR imput. If you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say it. Mind your manners and don’t ruin it for everybody else, grow up.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_5FLRQI2X2LU3IHMCG7HEAEFD5I Cat Astrophy

    It’s good that this guy already has a hobby when he decides he’s too tired to keep rockin’.

  • Christian Barros A

    Hey dear maynard, why don´t you came to Chile, great and lots of excellent wines to try and also… could play some Tool or APC songs along! KEEP ON Rocking!

  • Humanidee

    Thanks, I’d like to know how the wine’s going to go with an upcoming shipment to Australia, it’s now warming up here. Will they be transported in climate a controlled situation?

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002554565228 Helena Hanbaskett

    Groovy… Excellent advice.

  • http://www.indievinos.com Karin

    Dear Maynard,
    If you’re sending your wine through the postal service, you’re doing it wrong.
    Love, Me.

    PS. Loved your flick “Blood to Wine.”

  • davee

    dear Maynard youre a sell out pussy who will use his fame to sell shitty tasting wine at 300 a pop

    • Hehikdfop

      that was rude.  i suppose you could do better
       

    • erica

      very rude.

  • Humanidee

    I think you should make Ice Cream, too… I’d buy anything this man produces. I respect and believe in him so much.