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Live Report: Carcass, The Black Dahlia Murder, Gorguts, and Noisem in New York City

Chris Krovatin is the author of three young adult novels, Heavy Metal & You, Venomous, and Gravediggers: Mountain of Bones. He is currently working on multiple new writing projects, as well as new material with his local New York metal band Flaming Tusk. He is a contributing writer for Revolver and generally comes off as a good-natured pain in everyone’s collective ass. This piece below represents his opinions–and probably only his opinions.

Carcass with The Black Dahlia Murder, Gorguts, and Noisem, at the Best Buy Theater, New York City, 4/11/2014

  • Mission since this tour was announced: Carcass and Black Dahlia, together at last!
  • Mission since work ended at 5 today: I am going to get fucking hammered.
  • Cool sight of the evening: The word "Carcass" over Times Square, huge, in lights.
  • That said: Man, the Best Buy Theater is the least death-metal venue ever.
  • Coolest piece of merch available:  Coffee mugs featuring the cover to Carcass’ Reek of Putrefaction. Man, wait’ll the guys at the office get a load of this!
  • Sobering realization of the night: …man, I can’t rock this Carcass mug at the office. I’ll make someone vomit and get fired.
  • First up: Noisem from Baltimore.
  • Sounds like: Infectious vicious grindcore with overtones of old-school thrash.
  • Fun fact: The members of this band are all super-young, I believe. One of them’s only, like, 16.
  • And yet: These guys are as hard-hitting as any group of old-timers.
  • Cheapest beer available at the venue: Five-buck Budweisers.
  • Number of beers bought at a single time: Three.
  • Number of those beers consumed by anyone else: Zero.
  • Amount of my hangover from last night’s Godflesh show that’s hanging around: Approximately 35%.
  • Startling realizations made about my personal habits: Fuck off, it’s Carcass tonight.
  • Next up: Gorguts.
  • Sounds like: Brutal death metal with a progressive edge.
  • Fact I keep hearing: There are people out there who really like this band, honest.
  • And yet: I just can’t get into these guys. Too experimental, too plunky.
  • To be fair: The dude in the middle has some seriously lustrous hair.
  • What time is it: Drink o’clock.
  • Fun activity of the night: Watching Times Square theater tourists walk past the venue with startled and terrified looks on their faces.
  • Random metal royalty spotted: Carcass’ Jeff Walker, while I was out in the smoking area.
  • Observation: He’s shorter than I expected.
  • Next up: The Black Dahlia Murder from Detroit.
  • Sounds like: Muscled-up Hammer Horror via Swedish death metal.
  • Just so you know: I may have written about this band’s live show more than any other act I’ve covered. Check out the archives.
  • Personnel observation: Man, guitarist Brian Eschbach still looks weird to me with the short hair.
  • Notable tracks: “Everything Went Black,” “On Stirring Seas of Salted Blood,” “In Hell Is Where She Waits For Me.”
  • Track I wish they’d played: “Map of Scars” off of Everblack.
  • Look at the time: Drink o’clock again already…ugh.
  • Maybe you should stop drinking: Sorry, I could taste that Jack. We’re keeping this going.
  • Fuck it: Give me a Carcass mug! I can disgust myself at home!
  • Speaking of which: What? They’re onstage! Oh shit!
  • Finally: Carcass from Liverpool.
  • Sounds like: Anatomical diagrams flashing before your eyes in a maniac whirlwind.
  • Sounds here: Absolutely fucking amazing.
  • Favorite dude at the show: The guy who yanked me into the mosh pit screaming, “YOU ARE MEAT!”
  • Least favorite dude at the show: The big bearded guy up front who threw elbows and mule kicks anytime someone collided with his back. It’s a metal show, you fucking human zit.
  • Classic old tracks played tonight: “Exhume to Consume,” “Incarnated Solvent Abuse,” “This Mortal Coil,” “Corporeal Jigsore Quandry.”
  • Classic new tracks played tonight: “Unfit For Human Consumption,” “The Granulating Dark Satanic Mills” off of Surgical Steel.
  • You know it’s Carcass: Because Jeff Walker’s stage banter is scathing, snarky, and sweet all at once.
  • Approximate time at the close of the show: 12:30.
  • Amount of time it took me to consume a booze-soaking burger: Eleven minutes.
  • Comforting thought: I am meat.

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