1) White Zombie, La Sexorcisto: Devil Music, Vol. 1 This beach-friendly soul-crusher brings California attitude and Frankenstein groove that announce, rather loudly, that school’s out for summer. Blast it from a hotrod for extra points.
General smell of the room before Corpse: Beer-sweat, kielbasa, and cheap plastic.
“The Black Dahlia Murder (left) is everywhere: They just chill in the crowd and outside, talking to fans and watching the music. That’s pretty old-school. Young Metallica would do that.
Young Metallica: That’s right, I said it.”
1) Meat Loaf, Bat out of Hell Besides having the most metal cover art ever, Bat out of Hell is a record that takes the somewhat nonsensical parts of metal and melds them together throughout every single song, including the sack-less ballad “Heaven Can Wait.” Still the only record which can make me play air-piano.
Words to get used to if you want to be a metal journalist: “You’re not on the list.”
Check under Revolver: “Yeah, we get it. You’re not on here.”
Number of editors contacted: Two.
“Point of merch knowledge to be remembered: You could get a thrash-hungry metalhead to buy a lump of dog shit if it had the cover of Kreator’s Endless Pain ironed onto it.”